Grhgraph's Blog

“Outside of a dog, a book is a man’s best friend. Inside of a dog it’s too dark to read.” (Groucho Marx)

grhgraph — Thu, 09 Feb 2012 05:03:04 +0000

After two and a half years and much encouragement and/or nagging, I finally finished my first book. The title is “Words to Lead By.”You can find it on Amazon as an e-book for $2.99. I would like to thank my high school English teacher Everett Rees for giving me the skill to write well. If he were alive today, I would print out a copy and hand it to him personally. At which time, he would probably hand it back to me with a big red D+ and I would be extremely proud. That’s the funny thing about writing, it’s just you against the word (that’s not a misspelling). I never wrote anything with the expectation of achieving fame or fortune. Writing is just something I have to do and it makes me happy. If anybody else enjoys it, that’s just an added bonus.

This blog has certainly taught me more about myself than I could have ever imagined. After 125 posts and nearly 25,000 views, I have realized the value of self-reflection and challenged myself to do it better every time. I don’t always exceed my expectations but the creative experience is so powerful it’s hard to describe. It’s a lot like holding your own baby for the first time; an overwhelming sense of wonder and joy at a new creation. Now I understand my paternal instincts better and my sense of responsibility to others.

That’s the most important reason I had for writing this book. I wanted to impart the wisdom I gained in my 25 years of small business ownership to the next generation of leaders. The older I get the more urgent that desire becomes and it finally overtook me. I was never some leadership genius. I learned everything the hard way or by asking my father for advice. Over many years and with his considerable teaching skills at my disposal, I got better at it. Now that he has passed on, it’s my turn to teach the young ones how to lead and why it’s important to take responsibility. In some ways, I am very concerned about the younger generation because I think too many parents have abdicated their responsibility to the school system. Kids don’t learn the lessons that really matter from anyone but their parents and grandparents and that worries me.

If you’re a parent, give this book to your kids who are in high school or college. The lessons are universally true and not just about business. The future can be as bright as any of us want it to be but it’s going to take some very motivated young people to make it come together. I have nothing but high hopes for the coming generations and I intend to keep writing things I think can help them along the way. Whatever wisdom I have developed in my life is only useful if I share it with others. Keeping it to myself would be selfish and stupid and I have no desire to waste my gift. The older we get, the more our responsibility grows. Teaching, coaching, counseling and sharing are the best parts of maturity and those of us who strive to make a difference will know a greater sense of fulfillment than ever before.

This book is just the first of what I’m calling Guydebooks, catchy huh? The next one is going to be called Great Minds Think Alike (Almost). It’s a bit more humorous than reflective but it has some valuable lessons from smarter people than I. If I happen to get lucky and these e-books sell well, maybe I will dedicate myself to writing exclusively and get off the road some day. Whatever happens is all good because I’m doing it for the right reason, to make a difference for others and maybe some day one of these kids will follow in my footsteps. Thomas, are you listening?

©Guy R. Horst and grhgraph.wordpress.com, 2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Guy R. Horst and grhgraph.wordpress.com with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

“A beauty is a woman you notice; a charmer is one who notices you.” (Adlai Stevenson)

grhgraph — Fri, 27 Jan 2012 05:50:55 +0000

Andy Warhol once said,”… everybody will be world famous for fifteen minutes.” I’m still waiting for my turn. The closest I ever came was in May of 1977 in Meridian, Mississippi. The occasion was the Jimmie Rodgers Music Festival and I was given a backstage pass. I was living in Houston at the time and working in East Texas, Louisiana and Mississippi for my sales territory. One of the other salesmen in the Houston branch office, George Wellman, invited me to join him and his wife Sue as their guest for this annual event. George promised me that getting backstage passes to meet the stars would be no problem and he was right. On the weekend of the show, I met George and Sue in Meridian and we all went together to the auditorium. The stars that were scheduled to perform included Stella Parton (Dolly’s little sister), Mr. Bojangles himself Jerry Jeff Walker, Ernest Tubb and the Troubadors and the biggest star of them all, Willie Nelson. Little did I know but in reality George’s wife Sue was an even bigger star in those parts.

Sue Wellman was beautiful beyond words and charming in every way a woman can be. Let’s just say she had a lot going for her and her husband was happy to show her off. As we entered the back door the crowd went wild as Sue approached. I was two steps behind and invisible. I could have been dressed as Wily Coyote carrying a stick of dynamite with a burning fuse and no one would have noticed. This woman could stop traffic with just her looks but she also made every male in the place feel special. I saw grown men nearly come to tears after her generous hugs. If you stared at her for more than a minute your IQ would decrease by half. I had to train myself to look away just to save the few brain cells I had left at 23. The local rumor was something along the lines of good old boys having to return to grade school for remedial classes every year after the festival.

George had given me a button that said “PRESS” on it and that was my ticket to everything backstage. I carried my Nikon around like I knew what I was doing and snapped photos while sitting on the stage as Willie Nelson performed. After the show was over we all hung around in the basement drinking and talking with Willie and his wife Connie, who was almost as good looking as Sue. I met Jerry Jeff but I don’t think he remembers me or much of anything. Stella Parton was just as sweet as her big sister and Ernest Tubb gave the place a little class in his suit and tie. I will never forget that night as long as I live. I got to sit on a couch with Willie Nelson and actually have a conversation for several minutes. It was even better than being famous.

I have never seen George or Sue since then but if I ever do I will thank them profusely. Sue was one of the nicest women I ever met and she charmed me right along with everybody else that night. It took me years to regenerate those brain cells but it was worth every rational thought I ever had after that for that one night among the stars. Now ladies, if you’re lucky enough to be among this special group of women like Sue Wellman and Connie Nelson please keep doing what you’re doing. Getting charmed one time by someone like Sue is enough to sustain most of us guys for the rest of our lives. Consider it your patriotic duty.

“May you live all the days of your life.” (Jonathan Swift)

grhgraph — Mon, 16 Jan 2012 20:02:49 +0000

I was incredibly fortunate to have my Dad for the first 57 years of my life. He was the best male role model a boy could ever hope for and his friends were just as much of a positive influence as he. Most of his close friends came from our church, Ward Parkway Presbyterian. For such a small congregation, we had a virtual honor roll of successful men to look up to. My Dad’s best friend from church was Keith Worthington.

Mr. Worthington was handsome, intelligent and sophisticated. Classy and charming would be the words most people used to describe him. He was an executive for an exclusive men’s clothing store and he always looked the part. Beneath his Cary Grant good looks and stylish personality was a heart of gold and that’s the part my Dad liked best. They met in the early 60′s and became fast friends. They served together on every church committee and then in their spare time they looked for other ways to walk the walk. I think it was Keith’s idea to visit Lansing Prison weekly for Bible study with the inmates. They stuck with this impossible task for several years before they decided it might be easier to keep people out of prison if they could reach them at an earlier age.

From the hardened criminals they moved on to working with children at the Jackson County, MO. Juvenile Detention Center. Every Sunday in the late 60′s, they got up early for Sunday School there and still made it back for the late service at Ward Parkway. When they weren’t preparing lessons, they tried to raise money for their annual Christmas Party so every kid would get great presents. More often than not they paid whatever it cost out of their own pockets. I never heard them ask for donations but every year they filled up Dad’s Ford station wagon with gifts. Keith and my Dad were just 2 grown men playing Santa Claus for kids who had nothing.

All of their good works eventually came to a sudden end when Keith was diagnosed with ALS. Lou Gehrig’s Disease, as we all know, is always fatal but Keith fought for his life harder than anyone had ever seen. He lived for more than 12 years with the slowly debilitating disease and my Dad was there for him till the end. In his last few years Keith was on oxygen and bedridden but mentally he was alert and eager for conversation. My Dad made weekly visits to see Keith and give his wife Sue a break from the 24 hour care that he needed.

The thing that stood out for me was how much my Dad was uplifted by his visits with Keith. They never dwelled on the sadness of his fate or cursed God for letting this happen to such a wonderful man. Instead, they talked about the richness of life and all the opportunities they had been given. I’m sure they laughed more than they cried because they believed in God’s plan and their lasting friendship was proof of their strong faith.

All of us can learn a lot from these old friends. Keith Worthington’s last days were as classy and dignified as any of his younger ones. My Dad’s willingness to share this experience with Keith was just one more way he made a difference for someone in need. Keith inspired my Dad in every way one man can for another and his spirit passed into my Dad’s hands on his last day. Now that both of them are gone I believe that gift has been given to me and I intend to share it with as many people as they did. Goodness and grace will always find a new home in willing and hopeful souls.

“Why don’t they just make the whole plane out of that black box stuff?” (Steven Wright)

grhgraph — Thu, 05 Jan 2012 20:44:47 +0000

For those of you who may not be familiar with Steven Wright, this quote pretty much sums up his body of work. He’s a genius masquerading as a comedian. Which brings me to my question, “Why are so many brilliant people not running for office?” We elect the absolute worst candidates every couple of years and then watch as they implode with gross ignorance and incompetence. I know lots of people who could do a better job than the dolts in Washington right now but sane people with common sense and integrity steer clear of D.C.

And it’s not just an American plague either. Governments all over the world are run by despotic idiots who have to lie at every turn just to stay in power. This is not good and we all will have to pay a heavy price when the truth finally comes out. In my opinion, the truth is we’re morally and financially bankrupt. That means we can’t have everything the politicians have promised us and we may not be able to depend on each other either. When enough people come to this conclusion we will all be part of a brave new world. God help us.

Every year, at this time, I start asking myself, “How can I make the world better?” I love my work with foster children but I can’t help but think I can do so much more. I really believe in the concept of “think globally, act locally” but that’s like keeping one finger in the dike with the hurricane coming tomorrow. We have to aspire to bigger goals and work collectively to achieve them. If we let the politicians continue to set the course, then we all just boarded the Titanic.

I think there are 3 things anybody can do to make a difference for the whole world.

First. Forget the us against them storyline that has created so much division. We all live on the same planet, breathe the same air and drink the same water. We ALL depend on each other for our future existence and we will most certainly all die together if we don’t make good choices about our future. The first choice is simple, “Do we want to live together in peaceful coexistence or do we want to die as individuals?”

Second. Share the responsibility with those around you. Your family, your friends and your neighbors are a huge part of your life and deserve your best effort on their behalf. We all can do a better job of sharing the responsibility for making every day life even happier. It all starts with forgiveness. When we accept people for who they really are then we can expect the same from them. If you want to be loved, love others first.

Third. Think for yourself. The media isn’t interested in educating you. They only see you as a consumer of goods. If we all rejected the notion of insatiable consumption we would gain the upper hand with the media and with the government. They would have nothing left to sell us and therefore we would be in control, not them. Faster, better and cheaper has made us slower, dumber and broke.

My last suggestion is more of a plea for sanity. There are lots of people in the real world who are far wiser than the idiots who appear nightly on cable TV. We would all do well to listen to the voices of reason who aren’t trying to get elected. The truth is out there whenever we’re willing to accept it for what it is. When we learn to listen with open hearts we may finally gain the wisdom that will save us. That’s a New Year’s Resolution we can all accomplish. Here’s hoping we all do.

2011 in review

grhgraph — Mon, 02 Jan 2012 13:43:00 +0000

The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2011 annual report for this blog.

Here’s an excerpt:

The concert hall at the Syndey Opera House holds 2,700 people. This blog was viewed about 14,000 times in 2011. If it were a concert at Sydney Opera House, it would take about 5 sold-out performances for that many people to see it.

Click here to see the complete report.

“The world will not change until we do.” (Jim Wallis)

grhgraph — Wed, 21 Dec 2011 07:27:09 +0000

Good news! There are only 366 shopping days left, ever. Thank God the Mayans made 2012 the end, so we can get in one more day of bargains. This is the ultimate marketing opportunity. How much fun can we have in exactly 1 year? Think about all the things we have to have before we go and the best part is, we won’t have to pay for any of it when the world ends on December 21, 2012. If this doesn’t turn the economy around nothing will. No wonder Congress has put off any kind of sensible fiscal policy till after the elections next fall.

If you think I’m kidding you’re wrong. I like the idea of a deadline. My whole career in the printing business was one deadline after another. It was hard but it made me focus and kept me going for 25 years. My plan for the next year is to finish my book and publish it at just the right time so that it becomes the last bestseller ever. If it’s really good, maybe God will see it as evidence that there is intelligent life on this planet and give us another chance. If not and a year is all we get, I’m OK with that too. I’m looking forward to settling this argument once and for all, “What does it take to get to heaven?”

If we really believe in God, we shouldn’t ever be afraid of death. How many of us can honestly say that? Death scares most of the people I know, even the good Christians. My Dad just died after a 2 year battle with lymphoma and he never questioned God about his plan. He lived every minute to the fullest and never complained about his fate. He was at peace on his last day and that’s the way I want to be as well. God can take me home any time he wants me. I live my life without regrets and I try to make a difference every day. I believe that God has a plan and it’s not my job to question it. All he expects of me is my faith and my willingness to try.

If we knew, absolutely, we only had a year to live would any of us spend it at the mall? Nobody is going to remember the stuff you owned but everyone remembers your good deeds, your smile, your kindness and your laugh. You really can’t buy a purpose for your life. You have to give it all you have every day without expectation of a return on investment. That’s faith in its purest form. The more we give to others the more we get in return and actions are all that matters, not intentions.

Maybe the Mayans were just trying to tell us about the beginning of a new era rather than the end of the old one. Maybe we’re supposed to learn something from the crazy ways we have done things for the last 5000 years and try again to do it better in the future. In my mind, every day is another chance to change the future. All we have to do is learn from the lessons of the past and resolve to change our ways. If we can accept this challenge we may find that the next era in the history of mankind is the best one yet. Wouldn’t that be nice?

Let’s look at the future the way Apple Computer did in this ad from 1997, “The people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world are the ones who do.”

©Guy R. Horst and grhgraph.wordpress.com, 2011. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Guy R. Horst and grhgraph.wordpress.com with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

“Kissing is a means of getting two people so close together that they can’t see anything wrong with each other.” (Rene Yasenak)

grhgraph — Wed, 07 Dec 2011 22:30:59 +0000

I’m a little concerned about the younger generation. They seem to have lost their interest in the opposite sex. Behavioral psychologists could probably offer a myriad of answers to this question but I don’t think it’s that complicated. Technology is keeping us apart not pulling us together. For all of their insatiable need for attention and validation that their every act is awesomely important they still don’t get relationships. I think too much information is bad for couples. There’s very little mystery anymore and almost no romance.

I used to spend hours rehearsing my lines so that I wouldn’t blow it on the phone when I was asking a girl for a date. My early attempts were no better than this, “Hi, this is Guy. You probably don’t remember me but I drooled on you in home room today. Would you like to go out?” Eventually I worked my way up to the very romantic, “Hi, it’s Guy. I have a car with gas and $5 left over, are you in?” That actually worked pretty well probably because it wasn’t actually a “Date”.

That word seems to have fallen out of fashion with my kids as well. They don’t really date anymore, they just “hang out”. The weird part is they don’t have hangouts like we used to: Winstead’s, Loose Park, the P.V. Pool. They just go to someone’s house and play video games and stare at their smart phones. Back when, we had to make conversation. We talked face-to-face for hours and guys were expected to pay attention to what was being said in order to have any chance at getting lucky. I was never great at conversation but I forced myself to look interested because I really wanted to get kissed. My best play in sports never came close to meaning as much as my worst kiss. I would have traded all 3 of my merit badges for lipstick on my collar any day.

I know it sounds quaint and seriously out of date but if you haven’t tried it, don’t knock it. I dare the younger generation to give up their personal electronic devices for a few days and concentrate on each other as human beings not Twits. If you’re a guy, go buy a bouquet and take it to her house, knock on her front door and ask her out. If she’s not home, give her mom the flowers. I guarantee that girl will call you back because her mom will be gloating over her for days till she does. If you’re a girl and interested in some cute guy, just go to Arby’s and get 5 for $5 and take it to his house and knock on the door. If he’s not home, share it with his dad. It works just the same.

Relationships are worth the effort, trust me. No smart phone app will ever be as much fun as that first kiss or the second or the third, etc. Holding hands is pretty freaking wonderful too. Science has actually proven that touching is the most important aspect in the emotional well-being of infants. I don’t think we ever grow out of that need. I can’t count all the times the littlest foster children I meet have given me huge hugs and walked with me holding hands. All of the bad parts of my day are erased with each tiny bit of contact. When was the last time your smart phone gave you a nice big hug?

I love this quotation for the simplest reason. We all need to see the good in people and stop focusing on the bad. No one is perfect and we all fall short of others expectations. Let’s just not let technology keep us away from the things that make humans special like empathy, laughter, hugs and kisses.

“The parable of the lighthouse.”

grhgraph — Wed, 30 Nov 2011 05:58:31 +0000

Long ago, a group of men decided to build a lighthouse. They had all been seamen in their younger days and now they wanted to do something to help other sailors navigate the waters around their rugged peninsula. They all realized there was an urgent need for this to be done but they chose to work carefully. They discussed every part of their plans and worked out every detail. They all agreed that the most important goal was to build a lighthouse that would outlast all of them and be a gift to their grandchildren. With that singular purpose in mind they started to build a wonderful new lighthouse, the first of its kind. This wasn’t just a new lighthouse though, it was equipped with detailed instructions on how it should be operated and maintained forever. The old seamen thought of every possible problem and agreed to a set of operating standards that had never been tried before, by anyone.

After more than a dozen years, the lighthouse was completed and people from all over the world came there with a new sense of confidence in their safety and hope for a brighter future. The lighthouse became a welcoming beacon for people who had known only darkness and the light became a daily reminder of commitment to the common good. Even amidst nature’s most violent storms, the lighthouse faithfully kept to its mission. The seamen had laid its foundation on bedrock and it passed into the hands of each new generation as good as ever. Their grandchildren even worked to improve the lighthouse. Everyone understood that their very lives depended on their lighthouse and its original purpose, to keep people safe.

Decades turned to centuries and the lighthouse endured until the end of the second century when people started to question the need for it. The operating manual had been rewritten so many times that no one was completely certain whether it was relevant anymore. Others argued over the need to welcome more people to their land. And still others just didn’t want to pay for its maintenance any longer. After years of disagreement, empty promises by the leaders of the land and general neglect, the lighthouse …

Now reread this and substitute the word country for lighthouse.

The last part of this story hasn’t been written yet. How do you think it should end?

“More than any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness. The other, to total extinction. Let us pray we have the wisdom to choose correctly.” (Woody Allen)

grhgraph — Mon, 21 Nov 2011 17:11:01 +0000

I spend my days working with abused and neglected children and my nights trying to write something incredibly funny that will become a bestseller. I guess that’s why I like Woody Allen. He makes me laugh at the thought of total despair, hopelessness and extinction. Maybe, if I was bi-polar, it would double my chances of saying something funny like this.

In my opinion, laughter is like soap for the soul. It washes away all the grime of prejudice and leaves us feeling hopeful and caring. In those moments when we let go and laugh at ourselves, we are the closest to God we will ever be. His request that we “Love one another” is accomplished every time we laugh together.

This Thanksgiving will be the first one without my Dad. His smile and sense of humor will be impossible to replace but I’m hopeful we will honor his memory by telling jokes and laughing as often as possible. It makes it a little easier when I realize that God himself is laughing more this year because my Dad is there to poke fun at Him. I’m quite sure he’s already working on several jokes about how much he hates onions. Some people might think that making fun of God is bad manners but I don’t see it that way. No one can convince me that God doesn’t have a great sense of humor. After all, He created creatures like the aardvark and the platypus and who can’t laugh at chimps. God didn’t put us here to be boring. He created this planet to give us everything we need to be happy. Laughter is like music to His ears. I know I will never have to answer His question, “How come I never heard you laugh?” Can you say the same?

As we celebrate the Holidays this year, let’s all remember to laugh first and shop later. I, for one, would gladly trade any present for a great joke and a heartfelt hug. It’s been way too long since I saw cranberry jelly come shooting out of somebody’s nose.

“A small body of determined spirits fired by an unquenchable faith in their mission can alter the course of history.” (Mohandas Gandhi)

grhgraph — Fri, 04 Nov 2011 05:09:55 +0000

This week, I got into a rather spirited argument with another person who commented on something I wrote online at the Harvard Business Review. We were both giving our opinions on an article about stock analysts. My opinion was this, “The real issue I have with analysts is their inability to add value to the equation.” His response still puzzles me, “it’s not their job to add value.” We agreed to disagree but the more I think about his response, the more it bothers me. I cannot imagine even a single moment in my life when I would have uttered such a line. I was raised by a father who believed that all of life is about adding value to every single act. Have we really come to a point in history where some people actually believe it’s not their job to add value? If that is true, it might be the most troubling statement I have ever heard.

My earliest memories of working with my Dad are filled with times when I questioned him about why he was so meticulous in his work. His response was this basic value, “If you can do it better, then you should.” He was never satisfied with good enough and he believed his customers would perceive the added value of his expertise. He was right, of course, and people came from far and wide to buy his work. This must have had a dramatic effect on my youthful brain because I took it to heart and when it was my turn to do it better, I was highly motivated.

By the early 80′s, I was experimenting with process photography in ways that were radically different. I spent one whole year of my life working out the process for reproducing photographic films so precisely that they could then be printed as mirror images on opposite sides of clear plexiglass and be backlit for display purposes. Hallmark was the ultimate customer but my client was the printer. Without my equipment and our long hours of experimentation, none of this would have been possible. After we proved the process could be duplicated on a regular basis, Hallmark took the concept to Asia for production. It bothered me at first, that my efforts would never be recognized, but the experiment led me to other clients and much more work.

I could have said it’s not my job to figure this out for Hallmark, so they can just do it themselves, but that was never the point. I wanted to do it just to see if I could. Adding value is the most reciprocal thing anyone can do in their life. I created something that was great enough for Hallmark and to this day I am eternally grateful for that opportunity. They gave me the chance to achieve more than I knew I could and that knowledge fueled even greater discoveries later on. Those were the best years of my entire career because I learned to go beyond good enough. I think that’s something all the great inventors in history share at the most elemental level, they just know they can do it better and therefore they have to try.

Men like Thomas Edison. George Washington Carver, Jonas Salk and Steve Jobs altered the course of history through their unquenchable faith in their mission. Where would we be today if they had ever said, “It’s not my job.” Frankly, in my opinion, it’s everyone’s job to add value to everything we do. Good enough really isn’t and we’re not going to have an even better quality of life in the future unless we all try harder to make a difference. That’s one of the biggest reasons I keep writing this blog. I want to do it better and I am determined to keep trying till I get it right. Just read that title again, “A small body of determined spirits fired by an unquenchable faith in their mission can alter the course of history.” I believe the course of history can still be altered in amazing new ways by any and all of us. We just need to inspire each other to greatness. I may never become the next Edison but it won’t be because I never even tried.