“Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.” (Mark Twain)


I am always amazed by election year politics and the way politicians can twist any set of facts into anything that suits their nefarious purposes. Even at the lowest levels of government, distortion and deceit are common practices. And you know what makes it worse? We fall for it repeatedly. Let’s face it, we are about to elect the most dishonest president in the history of the United States of America and it doesn’t even matter what party we vote for because both candidates are equally capable of lying to get what they want. Welcome to the 21st century where truth, justice and the American way are just distant memories.

Given that I spend so much time driving, I am inundated with political advertising on the radio. I have heard back-to-back commercials that completely contradict each other and leave me wondering who, if anyone, is telling the truth. Then we have the daily polls to remind us of who is in the lead at that exact moment in time, never mind that the numbers change hourly and polls are inherently biased. Just asking a question a certain way lends itself to the answer that is desired in the first place. That makes it really easy to manipulate the outcome but polls are still a popular way to influence the election. Our democratic process has become anything but democratic and we are about to elect another incompetent leader in just a few months. That’s America, where anybody can become president if they win the beauty pageant we used to call an election.

All of this frustration with the political process has given me an idea. I wanted to test the accuracy of polls by trying one myself. I wanted to keep it simple and it wasn’t the least bit scientific but it did achieve some remarkable results. On my drive today I was taking two little  brothers to visit their mom. When we arrived at the destination, there was a large group of women taking an exercise class on a playground. I parked the car close to them and proceeded to get the boys out and into the building. Along the way, several women in the group voiced their opinions of me. (Is it catcalling if women do it to men?) As I headed back to the car alone, the comments became more colorful and plentiful. I was greeted with, “Look at that guy, he’s hot!” At that point, I turned it into a social experiment. I said, “How hot do you think I am?” That brought forth a stream of catcalls including several offers to bear my children and one older woman who said, “I haven’t seen a man that hot in 20 years.”

Now, I’m sure that carrying a two-year old and holding hands with his older brother probably improved my odds of being seen as attractive because lets face it, I’m 62 years old and I have my share of grey hair, wrinkles and extra pounds. I might have been hot a long, long time ago but I’m not crazy enough to think I could pull that off now. So what can we learn from this informal poll based on a random sampling of an ethnically diverse group of women of all ages? First, women never lie about men and second, I can honestly claim to be the hottest 62 year old Guy alive or at least according to the inmates at the Women’s Correctional Facility in Topeka, Kansas. Mark Twain would be proud of me.

©Guy R. Horst and grhgraph.wordpress.com, 2016. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Guy R. Horst and grhgraph.wordpress.com with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

 

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6 Responses to “Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.” (Mark Twain)

  1. Lotte Blot says:

    I am still laughing out loud!!!!

    Sent from my iPhone

  2. grhgraph says:

    Good. I thought we all needed a laugh. Politics is surely a cruel joke.
    Guy

  3. Marilyn says:

    So glad you ended on a high note. I’m sick of the whole political process but I still encourage everyone I know to vote. It’s a tough choice sometimes but an important right. Keep your posts coming. I always look forward them even though I don’t always have time to comment.

    • grhgraph says:

      I just wanted everyone to remember how easy it is to manipulate people into believing the lies that politicians promise every day. They rely on our desire to hopeful and they exploit us at every turn. The ruling class, that is made up of equal parts republicans and democrats, is the root of all evil as far as I am concerned. Anyone who still believes we have a legitimate democracy has their head in the sand.

  4. duaneburman says:

    Great to hear about your successful campaign to get elected from such a discerning group of prospective constituents, Guy!

    • grhgraph says:

      It’s always important to know your audience.The only problem with my fans is they can’t vote. Given the current political climate and the clowns we have running for office I thought I should make a joke out of it. It’s painfully funny.
      Guy

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