“I have always been more afraid of failing than hopeful of success.” (Samuel Johnson)

I watched a lecture recently on YouTube that prompted a revelation about the world of today. Fear of failing has become an epidemic, in my humble opinion. As I pondered this thesis, I ran across an article online that explained something called the negativity bias…”Negativity bias is a well-studied and long-understood concept. Negativity bias causes amplified emotional responses to negative events compared to positive events of equal magnitude. Negativity bias is linked to loss aversion, a cognitive bias that describes why the pain of losing is psychologically twice as powerful as the pleasure of gaining.”

I can’t take any credit for discovering this problem first so I think I will focus on how to make this less of a problem. First, let me give some examples of this effect in daily life and working in retail provides plenty of firsthand experiences. Today is the day before Thanksgiving. Having worked every Wednesday before the holiday for the last five years, I know what to expect when I get there today. If you would prefer a funnier take on the experience you could always go back to my previous post…https://grhgraph.wordpress.com/2020/03/14/all-is-well-kevin-bacon/. Today will be very similar and every bit as negative. The phone will ring off the wall with last minute requests for banana leaves, whole turkey dinners, spices I have never even heard of and fifty calls asking if we will be open tomorrow. Just for the record, no we won’t be open tomorrow and for that one simple gesture I will be eternally thankful.

Eight straight hours of negativity will only be offset by the forty cookies I made yesterday to take to work. That’s right, my antidote for pain is good cookies and I know I will get forty smiles today. Probably more like twenty because nobody can eat just one and if negativity is twice as powerful as positivity then I probably should have made a lot more. Almost seventy-year-old arthritic hands make that task kind of painful but I endured it just so I could see a few smiles today. Physical pain is much more tolerable than the mental anguish of customer service. To say it’s the most negative job I have ever had would be the greatest understatement of all time and that includes nine years in foster care.

So here’s my plan for the whole world to stop the epidemic of negativity. First, put down your smartphone and talk to somebody face to face. Look at their reactions to the things you say and apologize if you say something inappropriate by mistake. Your phone will never be able to do that and it works both ways. Maybe someone will be nicer to you if you’re nicer to them. Positivity can be just as contagious if we want it to be but it’s a skillset that must be acquired through experience. Your phone is programmed to deliver negative experiences to you so that you get the most emotional reaction possible and increase your desire to stay on your phone looking for something positive to counteract your negative emotions. Good people don’t do that to each other. Be a good person. It matters.

Secondly, if you’re in any position of authority, it should be your main focus to give positive reinforcement to the people you manage. Just saying, Thank You, can make a huge difference in the daily experience of your employees who are dealing with the stress of a negative work environment. And when one of them does something very special or above and beyond the call of duty, you have to acknowledge it in the most direct way possible. Buy them lunch or coffee or give them free cookies that your oldest employee over in customer service has brought for that specific purpose. I’m sure it will make him happy to share in that moment of recognition. People need as much positive reinforcement as we can all give each other.

Lastly, let’s be thankful all the time. One day a year of giving thanks will not overcome 364 days of negativity. We all live on an amazing planet that is full of natural beauty and millions of wonderful people, in spite of negative technology. The vast majority of people alive today have a better quality of life than all the previous generations in the entire history of the planet. Let’s try to act like we appreciate that fact. Every day that we get another opportunity to make a difference is a day to be remembered and valued. By sharing that joy with as many people as possible each day, we can give hope to those who need it most but we have to try twice as hard to overcome pervasive negativity.

As for me, as I am writing this post, I am also baking more cookies for a friend who needs seven dozen today before I go to work. He’s paying for my labor but it’s really my version of a labor of love. As I sit here typing away, I get to enjoy the great smell of fresh baked cookies and my cookies smell really good. Between writing and baking, I have come to the conclusion that in reality, “All Is Well.”

Happy Thanksgiving!

©Guy R. Horst and grhgraph.wordpress.com, 2023. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Guy R. Horst and grhgraph.wordpress.com with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.